Wednesday 21 March 2007
Funny
YOU KNOW YOU ARE LIVING IN 2007 when...
1. You accidentally enter your password on the microwave.
2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years.
3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 3.
4. You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you.
5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that they don't have e-mail addresses.
6. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if anyone is home to help you carry in the groceries.
7. Every commercial on television has a web site at the bottom of the screen.
8. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn't have the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for panic and you turn around to go and get it.
10. You get up in the morning and go on line before getting your coffee.
11. You start tilting your head sideways to smile.
: )
12. You're reading this and nodding and laughing.
13. Even worse, you know exactly to whom you are going to forward this message.
14. You are too busy to notice there was no #9 on this list.
15. You actually scrolled back up to check that there wasn't a #9 on this list
AND NOW YOU ARE LAUGHING at yourself.
Go on, forward this to your friends. You know you want to.
1. You accidentally enter your password on the microwave.
2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years.
3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 3.
4. You e-mail the person who works at the desk next to you.
5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends and family is that they don't have e-mail addresses.
6. You pull up in your own driveway and use your cell phone to see if anyone is home to help you carry in the groceries.
7. Every commercial on television has a web site at the bottom of the screen.
8. Leaving the house without your cell phone, which you didn't have the first 20 or 30 (or 60) years of your life, is now a cause for panic and you turn around to go and get it.
10. You get up in the morning and go on line before getting your coffee.
11. You start tilting your head sideways to smile.
: )
12. You're reading this and nodding and laughing.
13. Even worse, you know exactly to whom you are going to forward this message.
14. You are too busy to notice there was no #9 on this list.
15. You actually scrolled back up to check that there wasn't a #9 on this list
AND NOW YOU ARE LAUGHING at yourself.
Go on, forward this to your friends. You know you want to.
Tuesday 13 March 2007
The Italian and the Bank
The Italian and the Bank
An Italian walks into a bank in New York City and asks for the loan
officer. He tells the loan officer that he is going to Italy on business
for two weeks and needs to borrow $5,000.
The bank officer tells him that the bank will need some form of
security for the loan, so the Italian hands over the keys to a new
Ferrari.
The car is parked on the street in front of the bank. The Italian produces
the title and everything checks out.The loan officer agrees to accept the
car as collateral for the loan. The bank's president and its officers all
enjoy a good laugh at the Italian for using a $250,000 Ferrari as
collateral against a $5,000 loan.
An employee of the bank then drives the Ferrari into the bank's
underground garage and parks it there.
Two weeks later, the Italian returns, repays the $5,000 and the
interest, which comes to $15.41. The loan officer says, "Sir, we are very
happy to have had your business,and this transaction has worked out very
nicely, but we are a little puzzled. While you were away, we checked you
out and found that you are a multimillionaire. What puzzles us is, why
would you bother to borrow $5,000?"
The Italian replies: "Where else in New York City can I park my car for two
weeks for only $15.41 and expect it to be there when I return?"
An Italian walks into a bank in New York City and asks for the loan
officer. He tells the loan officer that he is going to Italy on business
for two weeks and needs to borrow $5,000.
The bank officer tells him that the bank will need some form of
security for the loan, so the Italian hands over the keys to a new
Ferrari.
The car is parked on the street in front of the bank. The Italian produces
the title and everything checks out.The loan officer agrees to accept the
car as collateral for the loan. The bank's president and its officers all
enjoy a good laugh at the Italian for using a $250,000 Ferrari as
collateral against a $5,000 loan.
An employee of the bank then drives the Ferrari into the bank's
underground garage and parks it there.
Two weeks later, the Italian returns, repays the $5,000 and the
interest, which comes to $15.41. The loan officer says, "Sir, we are very
happy to have had your business,and this transaction has worked out very
nicely, but we are a little puzzled. While you were away, we checked you
out and found that you are a multimillionaire. What puzzles us is, why
would you bother to borrow $5,000?"
The Italian replies: "Where else in New York City can I park my car for two
weeks for only $15.41 and expect it to be there when I return?"
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